Denise Richards did some professional bikini modeling today while vacationing in Hawaii. She also ended the Battle of the MILF’s, because Heather Locklear just got PWNED! Of course, the real loser here is Richie Sambora. Who no doubt saw both of his former loves then drank himself stupid and drove the kids through Disney World. No, I’m serious, he went right fucking through it. There’s a hole in Space Mountain and Tinkerbell’s probably not gonna make it. Which sucks because now who will give me a boner on my visit? Daisy Duck? Pftt. Right. *looks down* Okay, maybe.