Hilary Duff, who I forgot even existed, just released her new video on MySpace and surprise! She’s trying to shed her Disney image by being the sexy bad girl. Originality strikes again, folks. While I give Hilary points for humping a lawn statute (No joke.), how many times am I going to see a former child-star caressing her pushed-up breasts to sell CDs? The answer: Not enough.

NOTE: Jamie Lynn Spears, do NOT do a sexy bad girl video in a few years while your pregnant with your third (or possibly fifth) child. I know the idea sounds great on paper/the KFC napkin you doodled on with a drumstick, but it’s not. That said, should you and Casey Alridge miraculously figure out how a condom or birth control pills work (mouth not the ear), then by all means, PROCEED.

Hilary Duff’s father Bob Duff was sentenced to 10 days in jail yesterday during a trial over, I shit you not, who will pay for Hilary’s 21st birthday. (He was sentenced for failing to report the sale of assets, not for the birthday party.) Apparently, Hilary’s mother Susan wants to make sure Hilary gets just as much as her sister Haylie and took Bob to court over it. All this to the tune of $25,000, according to the Houston Chronicle:

The $10,000 her husband pays her in interim support each month is “not even enough to pay my own bills” and certainly not enough to afford such expensive birthday treats, Susan testified. She said she has to rely on Hilary for financial help to pay her lawyers and other bills.
In his cross-examination, Piro asked Susan if her “adult millionaire daughter” would be upset if she did not receive an expensive gift and party for her birthday.
Susan replied that her daughter “is emotionally upset by the abandonment of her father” and deserves “to have some kind of recognition for a young life well-lived.”
Piro asked her where she thought Bob would get the money, and Susan replied he could get it from the same place he got money to buy presents for his girlfriend’s sons.
“I know he’s a millionaire, and he’s got the funds,” she said.
When Bob took the stand a few minutes later, Brown asked him if he wanted Hilary to receive a comparable gift to Haylie for her 21st birthday.
“Yes,” Bob replied.
“You’re not mad at Hilary, are you?” Brown asked.
Bob hesitated, and Brown withdrew the question.
Stansbury eventually ordered Bob to pay $12,500 to Susan for Hilary’s birthday.

Jesus, let’s tie up the court system making sure Hilary Duff’s father buys her an insane birthday present. If that’s enough, I love Hilary’s mom crying that she can’t live on $10,000 a month and has to ask Hilary for money to cover her legal fees. Here’s a suggestion: Why don’t you quit suing your husband over ridiculous shit and live on the $120 grand you make for having a functional birth canal? I know it sounds crazy, but it just might work.

Hilary Duff plays Yonica Babyyeah in the new movie War, Inc.. In this clip, Yonica apparently likes sticking scorpions down her pants and having Middle Eastern dudes retrieve it while John Cusack watches. Neat. All that aside, even with a venomous insect in her crotch, Hilary Duff’s vagina is still safer than Paris Hilton’s. Like 100 times safer. In fact, I’m surprised someone hasn’t built a playground there yet for children.

NOTE: Full trailer for War, Inc. on our sister site IWatchStuff.com.

TMZ posted this video saying that the Duff Sisters Go Crazy. The reporter for KRIV was crazy, but not the girls. So they cursed, I would do the same if I guy like that following me down a long corridor after my parents divorce hearing…wouldn’t you?

Hilary Duff was spotted at Club Butter early yesterday morning. I think it’s cute how she still wears those fedora hats. You know, the kind that even Britney Spears won’t wear anymore. I’m sure the designers of those hats are thrilled. “No, please, Hilary, it’s alright. Britney Spears already ruined these for everyone, so, yeah, just take it off. You’ve got gum in your hair? And some tin foil left over from a dye job? That’s still hotter. Bubbalicious, baby. It’s the new sexy. Really brings out the foil.” Then they’d give her a handful of oatmeal to wear on her head because, you know, still looks better than the hat.

I was tempted to just put up these pictures without an explanation and let you think Hilary Duff spends her free time dancing on rooftops, but she’s actually on set filming her new movie Greta. And while I have no idea what the movie is about, judging from these shots (and these sunglasses) you can be sure this movie will be chock full of wild hijinks. And, if they’re still shooting for that Academy Award, alien lesbians.

Here’s Hilary Duff on the set of Greta, which looks like it might be the best movie ever made. You’ve got Hilary Duff completely soaked in a see-through shirt, and then you’ve got those sunglasses she’s wearing. Holy cow. Those are what the Terminator would wear if he was 80 years old and liked to yell at kids to get off his lawn. Check out this shot to properly appreciate just how amazingly awesome these sunglasses really are.

Forbes Magazine just released their Celebrity 100 list with the world’s most powerful celebs. They’ve added up annual salaries, web rank, PR rank and TV rank.

Last year Oprah Winfrey earned $260 million for the year! Prisoner Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears didn’t even make the list.

Here is the full list from Forbes: