Steven Tyler (seen here with girlfriend Erin “Just want you to know I have breasts” Brady) reportedly stopped into a SoHo Starbucks yesterday and almost caused a sister of the church to strip off her habit, according to Page Six:

A witness reports a nun went “crazy” upon realizing that the man next to her in line was the Aerosmith frontman. According to our spy, the nun started jumping up and down and yelling to Tyler “Have a good day” and, “I can’t believe that you are in my Starbucks.”

I had no idea Jesus’ brides were allowed to listen to Devil music and also drink non-blessed coffee. I’m sure they stir it with a crucifix, but what’s next? Blogging? Sorry, but I’m not competing with Sister Big’uns Holy Cathedral of Boobies.com. Especially considering that was my original name for this site. The Superficial? What was I smoking…

Steven Tyler is claiming his recent stint in rehab was only to recover from foot surgery and not drug and/or alcohol related. Did I miss a memo about it being Celebrity Bullshit Excuses for Rehab Week? Jesus. Anyway, for those of you who actually care about Aerosmith, here’s Steven’s formal statement to People:

“The doctors told me the pain in my feet could be corrected but it would require a few surgeries over time,” Tyler says in a statement released Thursday. “The ‘foot repair’ pain was intense, greater than I’d anticipated. The months of rehabilitative care and the painful strain of physical therapy were traumatic. I really needed a safe environment to recuperate where I could shut off my phone and get back on my feet. Make no mistake, Aerosmith has no plans to stop rocking. There’s a new album to record, then another tour.”

Foot surgery? Give me a break. Why couldn’t he just say it was depression? Oh, right, Kirsten Dunst used that… Why couldn’t he just say it was foot surgery?